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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29958939">HEY YOU TWO SHOULD KISS!</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/PuffyBunnyTail/pseuds/PuffyBunnyTail'>PuffyBunnyTail</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Eddsworld - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Drabbles, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Maybe edd x matt, Mostly tomtord tho, Random tom x tord, no beta we die like men, tomtord - Freeform</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-16 01:42:14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,232</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29958939</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/PuffyBunnyTail/pseuds/PuffyBunnyTail</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>I want Tom and Tord to fuck ...so they do... in different aus...</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Edd &amp; Matt &amp; Tom &amp; Tord (Eddsworld), Edd &amp; Matt &amp; Tom (Eddsworld), Tom/Tord (Eddsworld)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>13</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. I wanna be a Cowboy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Saloonatics/Red Dead Redemption Au<br/>Sheriff Thompson is in a pickle and Tord is the vinegar. Translation: Tom is experiencing a lot of trouble and it is Tord's fault.</p><p>(⚠️Warning⚠️ bad cowboy lingo you have been warned)</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The Sheriff was having a nice afternoon everything was moving slow and the town seemed to just monitor itself as the folks tended to their own business and kept there issues to themselves. It was like they were give him a day off.</p><p>He wasn't one to complain and did what he did best and got blind drunk at high noon and had morning hangover at about 5pm. He was so relaxed and he found that after a band of ruffians kidnapped a prince only about 3 months ago and the other sheriff had his eyes set on exploration of the rest of the west. For Thompson he was happy to warm the seat of the bar, nurse a tall glass of the good stuff, and smoke nice cigar.</p><p> </p><p>He was also friendly with the bartender that made his drink right each time and helped him home almost every night. He had to thank the man one of these days but from how there interactions went it's like he had already thanked him cause every time he enters the bar after sleeping off a hangover he is greeted with a beer and a greeting from the barkeep each time.</p><p> </p><p>He smoked the last of what he wanted of the cigar and returned it to his cigar box and pocketed it. He wasn't blind drunk yet but he was coming along with a nice buzz. He sipped at his drink and just watched as the bar patrons walked about and he look only once or twice at the bartender. He sighed again he was so happy nothing was going on he really like how quite is was it was so blissful.</p><p> </p><p>He knew he jinxed himself because like on cue and with no hesitation the doors the saloon were loudly opened and when he lazily looked up to see the most generic looking man he had ever witnessed and for him to be very untrained hold on a revolver commanding folks around at gun point.</p><p> </p><p>He grumbled every curse word he had under his belt and he looked up so unimpressed the criminal visibly twitched.</p><p> </p><p>"Hey fucker hands to the sky or you'll be full of lead!"</p><p> </p><p>" I would rather that than this sad attempt of a robbery and I thought I could finally get the day off." He huffed out and stood he with lack of care of the situation as well as safety of other from how care free his movements were made it very clear he was drawing his gun.</p><p> </p><p>The poor excuse of a robber knew this and shot aiming at his hand but missing by an long shot and hit not only the gun but grazing Thompson's hip and causing him to recoil in pain and finally out of his drunkin haze to finally a more serious mood and registered the scene.</p><p> </p><p>A closed off room with people in it at gun point by an idiot that doesn't know how to use it. From how he is aiming he does not want anyone dead from poorly aimed shot.</p><p>Before he could get another word out he saw in his peripheral vision the barrel of a golden revolver. He looked at it close up it had mahogany wood and a beautiful engraved symbol on it he couldn't recognize it immediately.</p><p> </p><p>"Sir I suggest you get on your way if you ain't lookin for trouble." Tord the bartender graded out. He sounds down right menacing and the way he held his gun was to easy and practice for him to be bluffing.</p><p> </p><p>"I said put your hands up-" before the poor fool could finish the sentence a bullet passed to close to his head and hit a stray bottle on the other side of the road out the door.</p><p>" I won't miss again drop the gun and go home to your ma' boy." Tord reaimed his weapon and he didn't weaver.</p><p> </p><p>The kid finally catching up with his brain and making the smartest decision he had since he entered turned around and ran out of the saloon. The parlor was quiet a second longer before resuming to its regular atmosphere of calm and relaxing.</p><p> </p><p>Thompson still hadn't moved though he move his hand down to catch the part of his hip that got grazed and he felt a wet spot and he groaned.</p><p> </p><p>Before he said a word Tord was from behind the bar and had his arm around him; he moved him to a back room it was filled to the brim with barrels of alcohol and bottles. He set him in one of the only available seat and he got to work.</p><p> </p><p>He grabbed the brim of his pants and with ease pulled them till only the nasty red wound showed.</p><p> </p><p>He stood up and grabbed a half full bottle of alcohol and he gave that to Thompson. The sheriff didn't hesitate to take a swig and keep on looking at the bartender as he walked away to another side room, from how much he saw looked like a little office.</p><p> </p><p>"Where you learn to shot like that Bud?"</p><p>He was genuinely curious. He had been protecting this town and bar for years and not once has he seen that gun or the keeper aim like that. He had got shot in the shoulder once and the man didn't pull that gun out he got a dusty shotgun that time and looked like he had no clue how to use it.</p><p> </p><p>"I got some history Sheriff?" He replies in the other room he soon emerged with two rags and he handed one to Thompson.</p><p> </p><p>"Bite on that," He states and grabbed the bottle from him. Thompson obeyed knowing this part to well.</p><p> </p><p>He put the rag in his mouth and waited for it.</p><p> </p><p>Tord pour a good amount on his hip washing the scar and blood. Thompson whimpered and his legs tensed at the awful sting.</p><p> </p><p>" Your gonna be fine just a gash ain't that big or deep either so no stitchings are needed." He states he walked off again and came back with raps. He placed the other rag on him after pouring alcohol on it he pressed it and to the wound stood up.</p><p> </p><p>"Hold that Thompson." He obeyed he spit out the other rag and keep the rag in place.</p><p> </p><p>"Where did you get the gun she's a beauty looks well kept and expensive." Thompson spoke and Tord pulled his trousers down a bit more.</p><p> </p><p>"He is from mah history, Ludvig is custom made." He stated. He was sure Thompson was use to that he wasn't one for meddling in folks' affairs anyways.</p><p> </p><p>"Ludvig? And not Ludwig why is-"</p><p> </p><p>"It's more popular where I'm from." He stated.</p><p> </p><p>"Norway?"</p><p> </p><p>"Norway."</p><p> </p><p>"Sheriff you seem well endowed why aren't you married." He chuckled and walked off.</p><p> </p><p>Thompson knee he was trying to change the subject. But he wasn't prepared for that question out in the saloon of all places.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>He flushed and he was ready to shot till he remembered where he was.</p><p> </p><p>"You know damn well why you cheeky bastard."</p><p> </p><p>" I thought you went to church and had that demon expelled, did it come back or did it ever leave."</p><p> </p><p>"You on the same boat as my queer ass you stupid son of a bitch." He hissed quietly to the laughing man.</p><p> </p><p>He made it a life long task to keep his secret of being queer from the world but one night he slipped and to who ever was watching over this world had gave him mercy cause he confessed to Tord he didn't like women all that much and preferred men and Tord didn't bat an eye or tell a soul. Tord later confessed his oddity to him and they kept it to themselves and protected there secrets as well.</p><p> </p><p>"I was only joking Sheriff calm down."</p><p> </p><p>He did, he cooled off and with Tord's assistances he was helped out of the bar and to his horse. Thompson gave a short farewell and he galloped away not staying for the good bye from the barkeeper.</p><p> </p><p>He was home and made it to his room faster that any limping man could with an injured hip. He laid down and he stared at the ceiling. It was rotting in places and warn in others. He wasn't exhausted but his adrenaline was waring off and he was starting to feel the wound more. He was also starting to feel his head ache come along.</p><p> </p><p>He thought of how that poor fool is getting yell at by his ma and how beautiful that gun was. Then his mind focused on the symbol again. He made it a note to try and remember it later for some research. He let the faint feeling of drowsiness take him to sleep he need a quick nap before he got back up for the rest of the day.</p><p> </p><p>_________________________________________</p><p> </p><p>It was the sound of knocking that got him up and he was well prepared to yell at the soul at his door. He opened the door to find a face he hadn't seen in about 3 months.</p><p> </p><p>"Sheriff Thompson!" It was Edward or Edd and he was back.</p><p> </p><p>"Eugh be quieter." He grumbled he had a weak hang over but one nonetheless and it hurt to be in direct sun light as well as most loud noises.</p><p> </p><p>"I'm back a just in time heard you got shot."</p><p> </p><p>"So dumbass tried to rob the saloon I just was caught off guard."</p><p> </p><p>"Hmm well you get some rest to heal up buddy."</p><p> </p><p>"I was resting." He deadpanned and glared at Edd.</p><p> </p><p>"Oh well keep up the good work then. Edd closed the door for him and Thompson was left alone finally he went back to his bed till a thought passed his mind.</p><p>It was that odd symbol engraved in Tord's beautiful gun. It bugged him more and more it was in his mind. He got up and sighed heavily he really just wanted to sleep but this was bugging him more that he was comfortable with.</p><p> </p><p>So he visited his least favorite duo in town for answers.</p><p> </p><p>"Like hey Sheriff!"</p><p>"Yeah like hey Sheriff"</p><p> </p><p>He felt his insides go numb and his face drop.</p><p> </p><p>"Afternoon Cabaret Sisters, y'all got a second to answer a question?"</p><p> </p><p>"Like you can totally ask us anything."</p><p> </p><p>We are like super honest and generous right?"</p><p> </p><p>Thompson's eyebrows twitched and he groaned.</p><p> </p><p>"Can I look through your old news papers I need to get some info."</p><p> </p><p>"Oh my gosh, Is that really it Tommy?" They both exclaimed in perfect unison.</p><p> </p><p>Thompson wasn't sure he could handle this much longer but he needed to know so he let his will drive him forward.</p><p> </p><p>"Yes that is it so please-"</p><p> </p><p>"Like yah you can look through our old papers."</p><p> </p><p>"Yeah like you can totally look through our garbage."</p><p> </p><p>They both paused then started to cackled. Thompson closed off the rest of there chatting and followed them to there "garbage" he was surprised to find all the papers all stacked up</p><p>And ready to be looked at.</p><p> </p><p>He spent no time starting his search. He found the most recent papers first and he found so</p><p>Outlaws final caught and put to trial while other news came from the growing treat of prohibition in the cites and the rise of crime families in North. Interesting but not what he was looking for . It took about 20 newspapers and his growing headache over the sisters and his hangover to see some hope. He had found some thing he was suspecting.</p><p> </p><p>It was a search for a man with a pretty big bounty on his head he saw the insignia on the front page and gasped. Tord was apart of an outlaw group he went further backed my finding reports and the grouping destroying towns commit an rather shameful number of train runs and the body counts.</p><p> </p><p>Most of these articles spoke of the leader "Red Bandit" and his heartless attitude once killed a man by tying him to a wagon and dragging the poor soul across the desert. Killed the whole McClain house hold by making the children shoot their parents and drown the kids. Stole a train and made the coal worker hop in the furnace to keep it going so he could kill the railroad owner miles and miles away.</p><p> </p><p>Jesus Christ, what kind of a suck bastard could do shit like this. He had yet to see a picture but was sure his bounty was some where in one of these. Tord must have left since the leader was so cruel. He knew folks did stuff for protection and survival but morals got the best of most good men. So seeing Tord left made him abit happy. Till he came across it. In all his glory Tord Dahling "Red Bandit" bounty 1,000,000 dollars wanted dead or alive."</p><p> </p><p>He held the bounty to his chest as he stared dead ahead. What the actual fuck man. He walked pass the sisters wordless and out of there home he left his horse and he made a beeline to Tord.</p><p> </p><p>He took about 1 hour on foot to get there but he didn't waver he walked to the bar finding it devoid of his presence and he didn't waste a second to go further to find a decent sized shack and the front door slightly ajar. He walked in to find Tord shirtless and getting his night clothes on. He looked like he just got out of his bath and didn't make an effort to cover up. When Thompson entered and quietly shut the door he didn't even speak he walked over to the well warn couch and sat down he stared at the floor. Out of breathe and in complete shock paper wrinkled in his clutch and eyes focused on the floor.</p><p>What the actual fuck?</p><p> </p><p>He didn't say a word but when he was approached and Tord had his had occupied with a drink and the other the gun he had pulled out early is when he finally had words.</p><p> </p><p>"You got 5 minutes before I put you in cuffs Mr. Dahling."</p><p> </p><p>It was quiet for a moment the Thompson felt the couch dip as he sat next to him.</p><p> </p><p>"What is there to say I knew it would come out one day and I knew you would be the one to discover it just hadn't thought of the next part much hoped I could have run this calm little life a bit longer."</p><p> </p><p>"4 minutes and why here? Why would you stop here so close to where you were nearly caught?"</p><p> </p><p>"No one would be dumb enough to move only a town down to hide so it was the best choice to hide in the least most expected place and that is right where they would think you wouldn't go being the smartest bandit in the West and all."</p><p> </p><p>"2 minutes 30 seconds, If you knew I would find out why stay so long why didn't you leave?"</p><p> </p><p>"Ehh you grew on me to much for me to want to go and I started to get comfortable just existing and not bounties or rival Bandit groups to worry about."</p><p> </p><p>"1minute where is the rest of your group weren't you a huge leader Of a number of dangerous men?"</p><p> </p><p>"I was and I'm not telling you were they are they have been living there own lives and I wouldn't jeopardize that over anything not even you asking so nicely." He smirked and he made eye contact with Thompson. He blushed and turned away.</p><p> </p><p>"You gonna make this easy, Dahling" Thompson felt he knew the answer already.</p><p> </p><p>" That is all up to you Sheriff, you have two choices and I am at your will; It is your law in this town anyways, so your word goes."</p><p> </p><p>"Yes or No Dahling, I don't have time for this I am hungover and tired as hell."</p><p> </p><p>" Well I'm only leaving out of here on my own will one way your not gonna like and I'll regret the other... well the other you won't be able to walk much and well both be very satisfied."</p><p> </p><p>" Your really doing this now your getting arrested  and now you doin this?" Thompson looked at him agitated. And Tord returned his look but he had his intentions written all over his face.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Thompson face lit up and he wanted to leave go home get in bed and just stay there. He was getting hit on be one of the sickest and most dangerous men in all of the west and the bastard was getting arrested while doing so.</p><p> </p><p>He knew had to arrest him he know he had to get him but the lack of care Tord had was concerning. He was very much on death road and he was looking to get laid even if he did he would arrest him right after it would be short lived and not in the slightest change his mind so why was he so relaxed? What was this sicko hiding that put him at such ease?</p><p> </p><p>Thompson got up and reached for his cuffs and found them missing he the reached for his booster to get his gun and found it empty. He sighed so heavily he knew he had once again fucked up. He glanced over to Tord finding him slowly unloading the sheriff's gun and the hand cuffs on the cushion on the other end of the sofa.</p><p> </p><p>" Well I guess this is how it's going to be huh old friend. I'll give you another deal if you want. Since I like you a lot. Come with me or Come with me. On on hand we can leave town and we can got further west to my other hideout or I hog tie you and drag you across the west kicking and screaming. So what will it be love." He had got up to put the the gun up there and tossed the bullets out the window. Thompson just watched he was surprised he wasn't scared nor did he feel tense he just felt helpless. Like there really wasn't a point in fighting or resistance. But he didn't act the way he thought he should instead of him staying ideally on the sofa he got up and jumped and him. Tord was quick to react and had the Sheriff regret his choice or really his instinctual reaction. He was up against the wall am struggling to break free and he just sighed out his last struggle to catch his breathe.</p><p> </p><p>Then he felt it. The shiver up his spine and the anxiety of anticipation. He was scared he just jumped at a infamous killer and Leader of the most dangerous group of bandits in the west. This man could easily kill him and the waiting was making him quake.</p><p> </p><p>" Ahhh that's why I really really like you, Love you always leave me guessing and surprised you never get boring and it's so good to have a challenge." His voice was changing almost like he was losing composure.</p><p> </p><p>He was now right in his ear and it made him close his eyes he didn't want his last view of the world to be a old wooden wall he would much rather the darkness. He could hear his bated breathing and his heart pounding in his chest. It made him squint his eyes tigger together. Tord brushed his lips up his temple and back to he ear breathing out sending warm air down Thompson's spine and erupting goosebumps across his skin he was so scared to move.</p><p> </p><p>" Please stay this way I would get bored if you decide to stop being you. Keep surprising me love."</p><p> </p><p>He was whispering and he let his hands go as he rotated Thompson to look at him. Thompson was mortified and didn't move a beat. Tord placed a kiss on his lips and he pulled his coat off and undid one of the buttons on Thompson's shirt. He kissed at the newly freed skin and his hands kept their hips against one another and he rubbed at his hips. Thompson budged and he pulled the man closer to his neck guiding him to his sweet spot as he shivered once again and he let some of his weight fall onto Tord. Tord rapped his arm around his waist and pulled him off the wall.</p><p> </p><p>"I'm glad you are finally coming around, love"</p><p> </p><p>Thompson grasped when Tords teeth nibbled at him he shivered put a moan and he knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that he was in all senses of the word royally fucked.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. All Good Devils Masquerade Under the Light</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>(Demon/Devil!Tord| Tord is a bigger pain in the ass Au)</p><p>Tom has sinned and Tord is sin incarnate, so why the hell was he still alive if the literal devil himself has done his part of the bargain shouldn't he be very much in hell burning to a crisp? Translation Tord and Tom make the usual demon deal but there was stuff in the fine print.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Well he was doing this. Yep he was doing this and it was gonna happen. These events are in the forefront of existing in the coming moments of this reality in which he currently resides in an they are slowly make the material manifestation into existence in the dimension of his current residence and nothing could stop this for he the one conduct these acts refused to back out of this current predicament.</p><p> </p><p>There was an issue though; he hadn't done it yet or at least to a 'no turning back' point he is simply stalling by dragging on this nonsense train of thought. Why was he nervous all of a sudden. He was summoning some lust demon not public speaking why was he chickening out?</p><p> </p><p>Well for most folks summoning a demon was a bit worse that stand up but he didn't have the mind to care. He was trying to figure out why he was nervous.</p><p> </p><p>He finished the bulk of the preparations but still he hesitated. He grumbled and forced his hand to comply. He instantly regretted it the room burn a bright red and the heat was almost un bearable. Out of the summoning circle in the floor first came a set of horns then the rest slowly. The demon clawed it's way out of the hole and it hissed and clawed as it pulled itself from the pit and the fire danced up and hissed as the creature finally emerged.</p><p> </p><p>The creature was handsome. They were strong and-</p><p> </p><p>"Hello Tom~" they sighed out as it stretched out its wings flapped and their tail waved slowly.</p><p> </p><p>"Your accent...uhh-"</p><p> </p><p>"Norwegian I was from Norway."</p><p> </p><p>"Your Norwegian!"</p><p> </p><p>"Your selling your soul for eternal pleasure!"</p><p> </p><p>"Huh?"</p><p> </p><p>"I thought were were stating the obvious or was that a genuine question if so no wonder your doing something so stupid as this."</p><p> </p><p>The creature relaxed into a slouch, on Tom's bed as it continued to look around the room. It almost seemed nonchalant and bored. He had to imagine how many idiots sold their souls this this creature so he had every right to be a bit bored.</p><p> </p><p>So Tom slowly moved from the floor and peered over the edge of his bed to look at the immaculate creature. Goodness they were gorgeous and they extruded confidence it was almost to a point of prideful but not quite there yet.</p><p> </p><p>Tom stayed quiet and the creature began to you with his things floating and messing with figurines and examining his old skateboards. He didn't touch Sally which Tom inwardly appreciated and he then began to move around things in his closet.</p><p> </p><p>Tom was confused when he pulled out his old pair of sweat pants abit bigger on him and a old band tee he bought 3 sizes to big on purpose to sleep in the demon put them on with ease and his horns,wings, and tail vanished. It was weird... what the hell was he doing?</p><p> </p><p>He got his answer before his mouth opened.</p><p> </p><p>"Well I can't walk around naked with a set of horns and wings protruding from me now can I?" He states and he look further and pulled out a red hoodie he had no clue he owned.</p><p> </p><p>"But aren't you taking my soul why would you wanna walk around?"</p><p> </p><p>"Not no need to be so eager I'll have it anyways I just wanted to do you a favor." He noted</p><p> </p><p>"Wha-"</p><p> </p><p>"Well I have to say I have been watching you for a bit since you got my ritual book from offline and I must say I prefer you alive and you soul intact than anything else I could come up with."</p><p> </p><p>"You've been way-"</p><p> </p><p>"Also your friends are roots and I have to say your adventures are far more entertaining than the underworld is so I'll be staying here."</p><p> </p><p>"Oh but what about my-"</p><p> </p><p>" Trust me I will satisfy you as much as you want~"</p><p> </p><p>That caused Tom to pause with a flush he had to duck to hide a bit of his blush but he knew it was in vane. He looked to the newly reformed demon who still looked like a hand sculpted deity even in old clothes.</p><p> </p><p>He didn't even Ben need to saying anything else to have him in front of him really close.</p><p> </p><p>"Would you like to start now?"</p><p> </p><p>He flushed once more and proceeded to look down at the floor. Tord ever patient didn't move a muscle.</p><p> </p><p>With a sigh of defeat and a visible tremble. Tom made his answer and sealed his faith.</p><p> </p><p>He didn't sleep a wink that night.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Maybe I’ll make a part 2 maybe????</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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